Trepidation
by elric-logic
Summary: Eren and Mikasa face the hardships of parenthood at the worst possible time in their lives, and needless to say, the military certainly isn't happy about it. Eremika / Multichapter / Contains spoilers
1. First Breaths

**Greetings! This is just something random that popped into my head today, and I really wanted to write it. It's not a smut fic, though that might change in future updates.**

**Also, this is just a warning; this won't be a very happy read. But, I do hope you enjoy.**

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Despite the overwhelming mixture of emotions that swam through him whenever he looked down to the two infants fidgeting restlessly on the blanket, Eren always found a warmth within the sloshing pool of guilt, regret, terror, and more. As he lay on his side next to the two who stared at him with wide, curious, matching green eyes, supporting himself on his elbow, he pained himself as he wondered what would become of the newborns' fate.

Mikasa was sound asleep in the next room, still recovering from the childbirth labor a few days before. It had taken a toll on her normally strong body, weakened while she had been carrying twins with hardly much more than rations to eat. Of course, both Eren and Armin had tried to spare her parts of their meals that they could; she didn't like the idea of them going hungry for her sake, pregnant or not, and she didn't take much.

One of the twins, the boy, kicked his legs furiously, learning the reflex of the muscles. The girl next to her, seemingly unaware of him, did the same, though not as fast or as hard, her fingers curling into the smallest of fists into her drooling mouth. Eren laughed darkly to himself; it reminded him of his shifting, and he nearly strangled himself at the thought of one of them inheriting his power.

That was, perhaps, the most stressful thing about their situation. Nobody knew what to expect from the still-unnamed twins, and they faced a court summoning to determine custody of the children. Would they be allowed to stay with their parents? Or would they be handed over to authorities for experiments? It went without saying that Eren was hardly an exception to being a threat; he was a grown man, one who was aware of his surroundings, could be reasoned with while in titan form, and was held responsible for any and all repercussions he personally caused.

But the two babies lying in front of him, hardly able to see more than two feet in front of their faces, were completely innocent of any collateral, if they did somehow shift. They didn't know right from wrong as much as they knew left from right.

It wasn't fair. They should have never existed, anyway, as terrible as a thought as it was that passed through Eren's head. He punched himself in the forehead for even thinking it, and his heart sunk when he knew it was true. They had only been accidents. Mikasa had entered his room that night seeking comfort after a tragic loss during their last journey beyond the wall, and the night had ended with their clothes on the floor and hidden feelings declared. They hadn't done anything remotely sexual since then, not wanting to foolishly rush into things like they had that night, but unbeknownst to them until a few months down the road, they had already paid the price.

Two burdens who weren't supposed to be in this cruel, terrible world watched Eren's torn face as he smiled down at them sadly, one of his stroking each of their faces gently, taking turns. The boy had gripped his finger, wrapping the incredibly tiny digits around his with such a strength that he wasn't expecting. The girl only met his eyes, green into green, staring at him with only a curious expression. Her eyes were paler than the boys, but her hair was sightly darker, both of them a strange mix between dark gray and light brown. Her chin was rounder, his nose a little more slanted and pointy.

A knock at the door signaled one of three things, and Eren's heart thumped rapidly as he froze, not knowing who stood beyond the wooden planks that separated them. Instinctively he jumped up over the twins, putting himself between them and the potential Military Police officer here to snatch them away. He wasn't ready for that, and he knew Mikasa wasn't, either.

"Eren," Armin's voice said through the door, knocking again as relief washed through Eren's system three times over. "I know you're in there. Open up."

"Armin," Eren said with a sigh as he unlatched the door's lock and opened it, revealing the young man clad in his uniform, matching Eren's, with the exception of Eren's boots still kicked lazily and untidily aside by the door and his jacket still in the bedroom.

"Why aren't you ready yet?" the blond asked, stepping inside with Eren's inviting gesture, looking to the twins still groaning quietly to themselves and drooling on their faces. He then met Eren's eyes, his gaze now almost level with his best friend's; both had grown considerably over the three years since they had reformed the new Special Operations Squad, Eren more so than Armin as they stood at their full, mature heights before each other.

"The midwife isn't here yet," he replied, turning back into the main room where the twins lay, Armin following closely behind. Eren retook his spot beside the two, sitting cross-legged this time, the belts looping under his feet pulling slightly awkwardly. He shook off the realization that this kind of feeling would shift his weight forward and if he were suspended in the air, he would be rising a few inches, without the help of his gas. He knew it was second nature now, having long since memorized how each movement and every flicker of his muscles affected his midair transit. It was weird not being in the air and not having the same effect.

"How is Mikasa?" Armin asked, sitting across from Eren and watching the children as the boy caught sight of him, the girl lying closer to Eren.

"She's-"

"-capable of answering, herself," Mikasa's low, throaty voice said, taking both young men by surprise as their gazes turned to find her leaning against the corner of the wall, having appeared from within the bedroom around the corner. She looked exhausted, her long legs poking out from underneath her white gown trembling slightly. Eren was on his feet and at her side in seconds.

"You shouldn't be walking around!" he scolded, bending down to lift her off the ground, but she held her hand out to stop him.

"I'm fine," she claimed, though the thick bags under her eyes said otherwise. Eren insisted on helping her to a chair from the main table in the room, Armin pulling it out and placing it near the blanket in the center of the room, stepping back to let Eren set her down in it.

"How are you doing today?" Armin asked, retaking his seat as Eren stood beside her, watching for signs of fatigue in the unusually frail girl. The pregnancy had taken quite the toll on her less-than-ideally nourished body, and she had suffered through forty continuous hours of pained labor that her two best friends had stuck through with her, by her side and squeezing her hands and losing sleep with her.

"I'm feeling better," she replied, giving him a weak smile that he returned. Though it was true that she was feeling better, she would still have rather been lying down, sleeping the morning away. But she wanted to see Eren before he left for yet another meeting with the higher ups to discuss their plans for the court hearing, though she wanted to see the children, more. "Thank you," she said to Armin, Eren finally sitting back down when he realized Mikasa wasn't going anywhere.

"Have you thought about their names yet?" he asked, regretting it immediately. It was a touchy subject for the two of them. Neither of them were prepared to create identities for the infants, nor for the legalities. Though he hadn't thought about it much, he knew Mikasa wanted them to have Eren's surname, but because they weren't married, that wouldn't be entirely possible.

Eren shook his head while Mikasa remained silent.

"How do you tell them apart, again?" Mikasa looked to Eren for an answer to this question. She'd hardly been able to see them since their birth.

"I mean aside from obvious gender difference, he has longer hair and darker eyes, and he's more restless. She watches everything and has her hand in her mouth most of the time."

"Eren, please pull her hand out," Mikasa requested suddenly, watching as the girl bit down gently on her fist with toothless gums.

"Why?" he asked, his hand tentatively reaching for the tiny wrist..

"We don't want her learning any habits that could lead to accidental self-injury. Just in case." An unsettling feeling crept between the three of them as Eren's fingers gently wrapped around his daughter's wrist, pulling it out of her mouth. Immediately her other hand flung to her mouth, which he held down with little effort, as well. Then she started to fuss.

"Don't you have a pacifier or something?" Armin asked as Eren took the whimpering girl into his arms hesitantly, nodding and gesturing towards the kitchenette counter. It was obvious he wasn't used to handling something so small with such delicate care, and was uncomfortable. Mikasa reached her arms out, requesting the girl with a smirk on her face. She hadn't held them yet, either, except for the night they were born. It had either been Eren or their midwife who held the children as she breastfed them since then.

Eren passed over the now crying baby, desperate to be rid of her.

"When is the last time they were fed?"

"I was in there with them an hour ago," he replied incredulously, watching as she rocked the baby in her arms, the cries already dying down but not quite disappearing. "Don't you remember?" She shook her head, meeting the small, teary eyes of the small girl in her arms. Armin returned with both pacifiers, handing the pink one to Mikasa who placed it into the baby's mouth, her finger pressed into the hole to hold it still. The gentle chewing of the child on her finger put her at ease as soon as the crying stopped.

"Let me know if your arms are getting tired," Eren requested, watching as Mikasa's face began to show exhaustion.

"I'm fine," she snapped.

"I don't want you to drop her by accident."

"I won't."

"Please, Mikasa, don't be stubborn and prideful. It's okay to feel tired and weak sometimes, especially now."

"I actually want to hold her," Armin said, speaking up on Mikasa's behalf. "If you don't mind." Mikasa ground her teeth, holding the infant to her chest defensively.

"There's another one right there," she pointed out, her eyes darting to her son.

"I've already held him," Armin insisted. "But not her."

"Then hand him to me. I want to be holding one of them." Both males sighed as Eren reached for the boy, Armin taking the girl from her tired arms, only to be replaced by their son. This time Eren knelt beside the chair, his hand holding Mikasa's under the boy's head, relieving her of the some of the strain. She gave him a small smile, which he returned with a soft kiss to her forehead.

It was then that she noticed the bags under his eyes, though in better condition than hers. Then she remembered that despite the midwife being there during the day to take care of her and the children, Eren was losing sleep over taking care of them at night, by himself. She had been annoyed when he would wake her every time he got out of bed to tend to the shrill cries, and whenever he asked her to sit up to feed them. She had completely forgotten about his contributions, guilt swelling in her stomach at the realization.

"Eren," she said quietly. "You're tired."

"So are you."

"But-"

"I don't want to hear it. You just focus on recovering and don't worry about anything other than that."

"Eren," she pleaded, unsure of what she was asking for. He was about to respond when there was another knock at the door, Armin taking it upon himself to set down the child on the blanket and stand to answer the door. All three of their hearts wavered as the thought of the Military Police standing outside the door scared all of them to death, Eren's arm raising to shield the child in Mikasa's arms from view as Armin's hand closed around the knob, slowly pulling the door open.

"Good morning," the midwife said, smiling brightly up at Armin and bowing respectfully to him.

"Oh, good morning," Armin said, stepping aside to let the small woman enter, relief flooding through both Eren and Mikasa at the sight of her, rather than an armed officer. Eren sighed as he stood to his feet, greeting the woman.

"Thank you for coming, again," he said, surprising both of his friends once at again at Eren's sudden spurt of maturity. He'd been this way since Mikasa first told him about her pregnancy, and neither of them were used to it, even months and months down the road.

"Of course, Jaeger-san," the woman said, smiling at him. She had been hired, of course, at the expense of the Scouting Legion, though she treated her job as more than that, as a personal obligation. Eren liked that about her, was the only reason he could bring himself to trust his family in her care.

"We'd better get going, Eren," Armin said, facing his friend. "We're already late as it is." Eren nodded, looking at Mikasa once before disappearing into the bedroom to retrieve his uniform, shrugging into it as he returned to the room. The midwife, whose name Eren didn't like to think about, was in the kitchen, already preparing Mikasa's light lunch when he came back into the room.

"Eren," she said, catching his attention as he slid his feet into the maroon boots by the door. "If you don't mind relocating Mikasa to the bedroom before you, could you?"

"I want to stay out here," Mikasa insisted.

"You need your rest, dear," the midwife replied, having the last say in the matter. "We can bring the little ones in there, if you'd like that." Mikasa looked down sadly at the child in her arms, not wanting to let him go. She hated that she barely spent any time with them, even if they were only a few days old. Armin took the liberty of taking the infant from her arms so that Eren could pick her up into his, setting the child down by his sister on the blanket and standing to his full height, watching the emblem of freedom on Eren's back disappear around the corner.

The symbol seemed so ironic, now. Of everything that the Scouting Legion stood for, Eren believed in it better than anyone else. He sought the freedom of being explore the world he was born into, and that alone was the source of his bravery to ever venture outside the safety of the walls. And now his hands seemed to be tied behind his back even more with the birth of their unexpected twins, just as the plans of the Scouting Legion were finally able to go underway after the overthrow of the stand-in king and the new-found support for the Legion. Freedom seemed even farther away as his best friend had to become a father to innocent people he'd never wanted to bring into this world, and especially not now.

The Military Police had been looking for excuse after excuse to slow down the Legion since the Reiss family officially took the throne with Historia crowned queen, and this was the perfect way to do it, especially because it involved Eren. Armin couldn't even begin to imagine the fear and stress that was surely weighing his friend down. He knew Eren was still embarrassed to be a father at such a young age, and with his adoptive sister, of all people. But he and Mikasa had never truly seen each other as brother and sister, and everyone else knew that, as well.

But Armin could also see that neither of them wanted to be parents. They were still kids. Eren didn't have a clue as to what he was doing, and though Mikasa seemed to have some motherly instincts, the idea of caring for people other than themselves scared them more than facing the Smiling Titan again, just like before. How did you raise a child, let alone two, in a world where danger was constantly threatening the very last remnants of humanity? Not only that, but they were soldiers and had obligations to throw their life away if it meant humanity making another step forward. It was bad enough, fighting hesitation at the thought of losing close friends and comrades, but now they had _children_ to worry about leaving behind.

And Armin _knew_, in the bottom of his heart, that the Military Police was going to use this against them in the hearing. And no matter how hard they all put their heads together, there would be no effective refute to that argument. He knew his best friends were going to lose their new family members, without a doubt. Even though they had been accidents, and even though neither of them wanted to take over that responsibility, they still didn't want to lose the bundles of life they'd brought into the world together.

It was taking a huge toll on both of them. Too many conflicting emotions with so little time to adjust to any of these harsh changes about to unfold.

"Eren," Armin said, breaking the silence that had settled as they were riding on horseback to HQ where the rest of their squad was waiting, along with the commanders of the Legion and the Garrison. Eren seemed to be out of it, lost in thought as Armin's voice surprised him, breaking him out of the stupor.

"Yeah?"

He wanted to speak his thoughts, to warn Eren of the impending tragedy that was soon bound to fall on them, to give him some time to prepare himself emotionally. Eren was either going to lose the children he didn't want, but still loved, or he was going to lose them, along with his humanity.

"Nothing," Armin said lowly. "I'll talk to you later."

"I already know what's going to happen, Armin," Eren said, his voice unrecognizable with the countless emotions that weighed it down. "I'm trying to not get attached to them. Mikasa knows it, too. That's why she doesn't want to name them yet. I've been trying to keep her away from them, because it's going to be the hardest on her. All she's ever wanted was to live a peaceful life with a family of her own."

Armin's heart felt like it was breaking for his best friend. Eren and Mikasa had been nothing short of close since they met, and they were finally beginning to test the waters with this new step in their relationship. Then they were thrown into the reality of parenthood, something probably scarier than fighting titans, unexpectedly. They had considered abortion, but couldn't bring themselves to kill a human when they were supposed to be killing titans, and definitely not when something so pure was so rare in this world.

And now that Mikasa had her own family, Eren, and even Armin, had to watch as her dream was taken away from her, and there wasn't anything they could do about it.

* * *

**I don't really have a plan in mind for this at all, except the ending (or at least something that will help wrap up the story). I also have no idea how long this is going to be. It might be five chapters or less, or it could be ten chapters or more.**

**We'll see what happens as I pull it out of my butt.**

**Also, the setting may be a little confusing, though I tried to explain it without taking away from the story. As of this period in time, Eren, mikasa, and Armin are all 18 years old, probably turning 19 soon, idk. It takes place three years after the current place in the manga (chapter 57), and Historia is now the queen. Eren and mikasa currently live on their own, in military housing, where they can still easily be watched over.  
**

**I made mention earlier in the chapter of someone (or more than one person, who knows) dying on the last expedition, and I don't intend to reveal who just yet. But when I do, it will be through hints, so keep an eye out. The midwife also shares the name of a deceased member, and because this story is told through Eren's POV (at least at first), he doesn't think about her name and that's why thus far she has only been referred to as 'the midwife'.  
**

**Thank you for reading and, as always, this isn't edited, or planned. Also, I have one request:**

**I may or may not end up having the Eremika babies get names, but if I do, I have no idea what I would name them. So any ideas would be great! There aren't any specifications by race or culture, as SNK is pretty diverse, but I do need one boy name and one girl name. Thank you!**

**(heart)**

**.elric-logic**


	2. Lengths

**'ello. Back again after fighting hardcore writer's cockblock and working nonstop.**

**To be honest, I'm really not even sure what's going to happen in this story. I'm literally just pooping bullshit as I go (hence why it took so long to update). But I have an idea that would kill me to write so I'm probably not going to. But who knows what the fuck this piece of shit will turn into!**

**Good luck!**

* * *

Time was not on their side, and it never seemed to be.

Those were the words of the commander when he opened up the meeting that morning, as he always did when there was something important to discuss.

The atmosphere of the room didn't fit the situation at all. The talk about to be had concerned the lives of two fresh creatures who had yet to realize the cruelty of living. A small group of people sat around one long wooden table, in creaky oak chairs that scraped against the cement loudly whenever moved. A single lantern hung low from the ceiling, illuminating pale, solemn faces. It was all just plain furniture in a stone room in an abandoned castle due to a unnerving pestilence that was driving the last of a remarkable race to their deaths. Simple pieces of work meant to assist humans in existing.

But these people weren't humans anymore.

The people in the room were the only connection to the plain, ordinary scene, that existed somehow in a reality of choosing to die so that someone else could live. Once innocent minds that had grown up sheltered, each taking on individual mentalities that brought them to enlist in the armed forces, somehow all of them had chosen the right paths to end on this note, in this room. Having ventured into the depths of monsters that they could only hide from to survive, these righteously prideful people all sat around each other, existing with a struggle to find a solution in a world with no hope.

These people who had seen true hell were not humans anymore. Humans hid behind the walls, pretending the Titans didn't exist. They went about their days focusing on trivial things, such as income, relationships, what to serve for dinner. Humans had the ability to ignore it, to live on pointless lives as humanity slowly sunk downward into a hole too deep to climb out of. People who joined the Scouting Legion weren't humans.

That's how Eren saw it. Humans were idiots for being content with such a cowardly approach to the world they were born. They all had rights to live, and they sure as hell had the right to explore the world they lived in. The Scouting Legion was the last true hope for humanity, and as more and more opposition to the force went underway, it seemed as though humans didn't want to see success; they would rather die out than accept their true reality.

"Eren, snap out of it," Armin said from far away, and suddenly the smoky haze around his thoughts drifted, as he felt Armin's hesitant hand shaking his shoulder. He blinked; the scene around him came to life. All eyes that had been on the commander a second ago were now gawking at him. One moment he was listening to the conversation, and the next he was so lost in thought that he couldn't see anything right in front of his face.

"Why the hell are you crying?" Levi asked, sitting directly across from Eren, his arms crossed and his expression unreadable. Eren then became aware of the slight decrease in temperature that rippled down his cheeks, his fingertips investigating and returning evidence of strongly evoked emotions.

"I don't know, sir," he admitted, staring at the grain in the tabletop.

"Were you even paying attention to what was being said?"

"No, sir."

"Get out of here, then. We'll save your damned brats without your help."

Armin's arms were immediately thrown around Eren's shoulders as the shifter rose from his seat angrily, the chair falling back with a loud, unnoticed clatter against the concrete. Connie's arms were thrown around the boy's waist, scared that Eren would suddenly try to spring forward and throw Armin off of him, but to everyone's surprise, he didn't.

"Sit down and listen, you brat. You don't have a choice."

Silently, Eren obliged, picking up the fallen chair and retaking his seat, heat in his face. He didn't even know why he stood up in the first place. The corporal was right, even if he hadn't stated it directly; Eren should be focusing on taking responsibility for his foolish actions almost a year ago, not leaving it to everyone else.

Both Erwin and Levi had made it clear that they were only going to help Eren and Mikasa because of the fact that the Military Police and all associated parties had an opportunity to get their dirty hands on leverage that threatened mankind even more than just the Titans, as well as information that shouldn't be leaked. Nobody was certain if the offspring of a Titan shifter would possess the same abilities, but if anybody was going to find out, it wasn't going to be a group that would use it for the wrong reasons. There was potential strategic purpose, as well, if the children were raised as weapons of the Scouting Legion, like Eren was, as cold and harsh of a fact as it was, (albeit unlikely).

There was also the threat of the children being potentially harmful and uncontrollable if utilized in the wrong hands, and the imminent danger of power-hungry, misinformed bastards getting their way.

And deep down, though neither of the two had announced it, Erwin didn't want to see two of his greatest soldiers suffer from the emotional turmoil, and Levi didn't want to see innocent lives cast aside (despite the fact that he supported their consideration for abortion, earlier in Mikasa's pregnancy).

"Now if we're done crying about things we can't change, let's _re-discuss_ the situation at hand," Levi said, not caring enough to hide the irritation in his tone.

"As I was saying," the commander continued, all eyes turning back to him. "So far, we've only planned one solid defense. We could argue the same thing we put forward during Eren's trial after it was discovered that he was a Titan, and that is that nobody but the skilled and experienced members of the Scouting Legion, primarily Levi, could handle such a task of dealing with and taming human-Titans. We would use Eren as an example to show that the wielder of his power can be controlled, and back it up with the fact that there have been no issues with him thus far, other than multiple parties trying to get their hands on him."

"And," Armin said, speaking up as he looked at the notes in front of him that he had been taking during the discussion. "There are a couple of counterarguments we've predicted they will use against this option, but the most obvious one almost completely refutes our stance. First, they would argue that Eren had lived in fear of Titans his whole life, and fears his own powers, of which his children aren't even capable of doing, yet. They aren't capable of being controlled by fear like Eren is. They would hypothetically also argue that while Eren is in his Titan, he is usually able to control what he is doing and fight the Titan's will, as documented during one of Eren's interrogations. It is also highly speculated that the infants are likely not able to possess the same ability to fight off the killing instinct, given that, as reported by Eren, it takes a lot of will and self-control, and we're talking about newborns who can't even express a true smile until they're about four months old. But as for our own refute to this counterargument... Well, I'll just leave this part to you, Commander."

Erwin sighed, knowing Armin didn't want to be the one to tell Eren their plan.

"Just because the children cannot be controlled by the means that you can, does not mean that they cannot be eliminated if it comes to that."

"_What?!_" Eren cried, standing again as his fists smashed into the table.

"Just like he did for you, Levi will take full liability," Erwin continued, as if Eren's outburst of rage hadn't just occurred. "Except the whole Legion will take responsibility, this time. Eren, the same thing we told Zackly at your trial still stands today, that if you step even one toe out of line Levi will not hesitate to end your life. We may be closer than friends and comrades, but that still doesn't change the fact that we will kill you if we have to, and we are prepared to kill your children, as well. We will make that claim. Please don't take it in the wrong light. We made the promise to protect humanity, and because we knew it would save you."

Eren didn't speak, and continued to bore his viridian gaze into the table. Erwin took his lack of disagreement to mean acceptance, something his gut had told him to do countless times in the past; he had yet to be wrong.

"So, to re-cap," he continued. "So far, our only option of defense is to state that no party but the Scouting Legion could handle two rampaging Titan shifters, given our experience not only on the battlefield, or the personal skills of Levi (which were enough to convince them before), but also our success with controlling Eren. If the prosecutor tries to argue that Eren is different, which he is, we remind them that we are willing to execute them if need be, as the same still applies with their father. Any further counterargument on their part would be silly and desperate, and will be dealt with at the time, if it happens."

"Another refute they could make to our defense," Armin said, taking over once again with his notes. "Is that they should be experimented upon, just to be sure they aren't a threat. Though ridiculous as that is, we fear that they may have some sort of a point, there. Eren is different, in that he can control himself as well as be controlled. Not only that, but what really won the judge over was Eren's desire to fight for humanity with his Titan power and the Legion's desire to use him for strategic purposes- the retaking of Trost is more than enough proof for that. We've already proven that Eren has been more than useful to mankind as not only a sign of hope and moving forward, but also a military weapon, so that role is already filled. We can't really argue the strategic use of irrational, raging infants who would be just as human as regular Titans, without lots of effort spent into training them. And even then, Eren already fills that role better than they could, if they even have that power."

"What Arlert is trying to say," Levi interrupted. The blond was taking too long, and Eren looked a little lost. "Is that we have you to use for militia purposes. Your brats could be a useful source of knowledge if dissected upon. You, as in your kind, were considered to be used in humanity's best interests, the first being as a means of protecting them and helping them move forward. The second was to gain information through experimentation and dissection. We have the first covered, but not the second."

"But they're just _babies_!" Eren screamed as he stood abruptly, his fingers digging into the wood at their implications. Hot tears burned in his eyes. "They're hardly a week old! Where's the fucking morality in that?!"

"Fuck morals," Levi responded, as calm as ever. "They don't exist anymore. This is a battle of leverage for the prosecutor. If the Military Police and all associated with them control your children, they control you. If they control you, they control the Scouting Legion. If they control us, they control the fate of mankind. Do you think they're really going to lose sleep over something as meager kidnapping when it means the ultimate form of power?"

Eren's fury didn't diminish in the slightest, despite his best efforts to control himself.

"And what about _killing_ them?!"

"It's the same damn thing to them, Eren. Either way, they get what they want."

"Armin!" Eren yelled, his hair brushing wildly as he snapped his head to his friend. "What are the odds that our only defense against them is going to work?"

"Eren..."

"Armin! Just fucking tell me!"

"Well, not very likely, if they use the last counterargument against us," he admitted. "But if they don't, I think we have a good chance of saving the babies."

"And what's the likelihood of them using it against us?!"

"Eren, we shouldn't-"

"Damnit, Armin!" Eren yelled, turning on his heel with fiery, clenched fists. He didn't understand why he was so livid. He had known this would be happening before the meeting even commenced, he just didn't think it would feel so..._hopeless_. And with Armin trying to get his hopes up and protect him from the truth like that, especially after what his friend had said earlier, about warning him that this would be the outcome...

He hated feeling like he was being treated like a child. He hated that he _was_ a child, deep down, one forced to be a man at too young of an age when his mother was murdered.

Knowing his anger was unruly and not helping anything, Eren began to storm out of the room to blow off steam.

"I thought you didn't even want them." Levi's taunting tone made Eren freeze in his tracks. It was only for a split second, however, for in the blink of an eye Eren was leaping onto the table, his fist outstretched and colliding with the corporal's now-shattered nose. Blood gushed from his face between Eren's tight fingers as the two fell towards the ground, Levi's chair tipping back with the weight of both of them as Eren leaned forward onto him.

Levi threw one hand behind his head to cushion the inevitable fall, the other gripping Eren's wrist and twisting it painfully with a sickening crack, pushing the furious boy off of him and onto the ground where he rolled over twice before coming to a stop. Once the chair colliding with the stone ground he tumbled backwards in a somersault, resting on one knee in a crouch as he held his nose with bloody fingers.

Eren's chest heaved with fury as he rested on his side, pushing up on one elbow and digging his fingers into the palm, cutting into the skin. He didn't notice as he drew his own blood, mixing it with Levi's.

He didn't care if he was punished for hitting his heichou. The bastard deserved it.

Nobody spoke as Levi watched Eren shakily stand, his back to him before he turned around. He approached the still-crouching Levi and held out a hand wordlessly, staring at the ground, Levi gripping it and pulling himself up as he glared at the young soldier.

"You're right," Eren said quietly, daring to speak with the tension in the room too thick to breathe. "I don't want them. Not now. Not in this world. Not when we're barely surviving."

"Then why did you do something to stupid, and not bother to think about the consequences?" Eren fell to his knees, gripping his head in fuming vexation as the hot tears still in his eyes spilled out and ran down his red cheeks in angry rivers.

"Because I'm just a stupid kid!" he screamed, sobs scratching their way out of his chest as he couldn't hold it in anymore.

"Eren, you maybe still be a kid, but you're not stupid," Levi replied calmly, watching the boy crouching in front of him cry as he held his still-gushing nose. "I told you this a long time ago, and that is you don't know what is going to happen when you make a decision. You can't blame yourself because there was no way you could have known, so stop crying about things you can't change, and stand up. Be a fucking man and try to fix the problem at hand. If you can't, you have no other choice but to accept the consequences and spend as much time with them as you can. That, or you can try to not get too attached."

"Heichou," Eren said sadly, trying to force back his wretched sobs. His heart ached terribly.

"Levi," Erwin said, the short man turning his head towards the commander who had stood from his chair. "We should get you to a doctor."

"Ah, yes," he said, seeming to remember that his nose was broken. "The brat did punch me."

"Did you forget?" said a skeptic soldier whose name Eren could never remember, one from Hanji's squad. Levi acted as if he didn't hear him, and instead held his other hand out for Eren, who was still trying to get his crying under control.

"Stand up," Levi said to him, causing Eren to look up, his face still wet but the tears finally at a standstill. "You don't have any other options."

Sniffling once more and wiping his cheeks off with his sleeve, Eren nodded, then clasped his heichou's hand and pulled himself up to his full height.

"But what about the meeting?" he asked, his voice shaking slightly. They had only been there for an hour, and barely that. Hardly anything had been accomplished, either, other than their likely failure at saving his children from being taken from him.

"We'll re-meet tomorrow," Erwin said. "All we can do is keep thinking, but there isn't much more left to discuss here. So far, that's our only solid plan as far as the trial goes."

"And even that doesn't work," Eren said stiffly, his teeth gritted.

"You're all dismissed," Erwin said, officially closing the meeting as he ignored Eren's comment. He stepped over to Levi, pulling out a handkerchief from his back pocket and handing it to him.

"Let's go, Eren," Armin said, grabbing his friend's elbow and tugging at the sleeve towards the door as Erwin and Levi temporarily tended to the bloody nose. Eren followed, his head feeling full of hot steam. He was so lost in thought that by the time he and Armin had mounted their horses tethered in the stables and began the two-hour journey back to base, he hadn't realized that he had been acting on autopilot.

They traveled back in silence, both of their minds zipping through tangles of thoughts of the trial one week ahead of them and everything associated with it. Eren had never felt so stressed in his life. When he was a child, stuck inside the walls, he'd been able to join the Scouting Legion and venture beyond the walls. When he was convicted as a traitor for transforming the first time, he'd had Mikasa to protect him and Armin to talk their way out of trouble. When comrade after comrade dies, he still has their dedication and sacrifice in his heart to continue driving him on, along with the rest of the Legion.

But this time, there didn't seem to be a solution.

"I'm surprised heichou didn't punish you," Armin said after a long period of neither speaking, sick of the silent void and desperate to fill it.

"Me, too," Eren admitted. "I half-expected him to make me stay and clean the place top to bottom. But even if he did punish me, it wouldn't have made a difference, no matter what it was. I don't regret it."

"It was a pretty impressive hit," Armin complimented.

"Thanks."

"It was strangely satisfying to see him bleed." Eren turned his head, barely believing that those words had just come out of his otherwise reserved friend's mouth.

"That's a weird thing to hear you say," he said, brows raised as he chuckled. Armin only laughed with him, sort of surprised at himself despite the fact that what he'd said was entirely true.

"Yeah..." His voice trailed off, not wanting to relish on the thought.

"Hey Armin?" Eren asked suddenly, the tone of his voice making Armin suspicious about the thoughts going through the brunette's head.

"Yes?"

"Have you considered the possibility of us... I don't know... maybe hiding them?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like leaving the kids with someone else we trust to watch over them."

"They're under court order to appear with you at the trial," Armin reminded him. "If they go missing, it will be considered treason against you and you'll probably be arrested and locked away for the rest of your life. Mikasa, too."

"Oh." Eren had been expecting that answer, but he had to hear it from Armin to be sure that it was the case. They rode on in silence after that, both of them lost in heavy thought. The atmosphere between the two friends was tense, and for a moment Armin was reminded of the trip just a week before, when Mikasa had been in labor.

She had been lying, heavily cushioned with blankets, in a wagon with Armin by her side pulled by the horse Eren was guiding, because he was a faster rider than his blond counterpart. The rest of the Special Operations Squad had ridden along with them, the group having stayed in the old headquarters until Mikasa's expected due date, where, the day before, they'd been planning on traveling to the base in which the Military Court resided, where she and Eren were to stay in military housing to stay under close watch. But, unexpectedly, Mikasa had gone into labor a week early than the projected date, and chaos ensued to get her to a doctor before the children were born.

Needless to say, it was a very tense, very long journey back. And once they'd arrived, Mikasa had been brought to a doctor, who quickly prepared a bed for her in his small clinic. They waited through the long, strained hours as the doctor went through the proper breathing techniques with her, explaining what was going on as she passed through certain stages of labor, and giving her a numbing shot in her lower back towards the end of the birth, when the pain was getting to be too much for her. According to Mikasa, it had taken effect immediately but was very weak, and had worn off shortly before the actual birth.

The boy came first, without any problems, and they waited a bit to birth the placenta. But to their great surprise, another baby, the girl came a twenty minutes later, and Armin's best friends were then young parents of two. Mikasa had rested the next day in the clinic and was then transferred to the furnished living space on base that she and Eren were to share, and Armin had put in a request for temporary stationing at the same location, at least until the trial, which Erwin had gladly and instantly approved of.

Mikasa had spent the last few days recovering from the forty-hour labor while Eren and Armin met with the Special Ops Squad, along with the squad leaders and senior team leaders in the Scouting Legion to discuss the matter at hand. And while Eren's Titan form hadn't been able to remain unpublicized, the twins' existence as children of the most controversial man in history was well hidden.

So that's where they found themselves as the plan to retake Wall Maria was temporarily put on hold, just as they were nearing completion of setting up supply stocks in the area so that they could take any route to Shiganshina. It had taken a few years' worth of patience, hundreds of casualties, and plenty of determination and bravery from everyone in the Scouting Legion, but mankind was closer than ever to their victory against the Titans.

It was only natural that something else that another roadblock come out to stop them when they were least expecting it.

"Armin?" Eren asked, the first to speak in over an hour, as the base could be seen in the distance.

"Yeah?" Armin responded.

"Don't make fun of me for forgetting, but when is the trial, again, exactly?"

"Five days from now."

"And they have to have names by then?"

"Technically, by law, yes."

"Could you name them?"

Armin pulled on the reigns of his horse suddenly, coming to a halt. Eren followed suit a moment later, turning his horse around to face Armin and meet his eyes. They stared hard at each other, lapis on emerald, for a long moment, Armin's careful voice breaking the silence soon after.

"Why me?" he asked, giving his friend a questioning look.

"Why not?"

"Because they're _your_ children, and Mikasa's, too."

"She wouldn't mind. She's the one who came up with the idea."

"Why would you guys-"

"Armin, you're the closest thing to family that we have. As far as we're concerned, you're a part of it just as much as the children are." Armin didn't know what to say to that. Eren and Mikasa had always had their own sort of relationship, one that had always been just between them, one that hardly ever surfaced since the downfall of Shiganshina and Wall Maria. Even as a child Armin knew his two best friends would grow up to be inseparable partners, whether that meant lovers or not.

And when Mikasa first discovered she was pregnant, she told Armin first, right before telling Eren, though Eren had already told Armin that they had slept together beforehand. They didn't talk about it to anyone other than their heichou and danchou, preferring to keep their feelings a secret until they couldn't do it anymore; though the two never had a problem in front of Armin. They had been shy at first, blushing at any sort of physical contact with each other. They hid it well to everyone else, but with Armin, it was like they didn't feel the pressure to try. And even once they'd grown more comfortable with their feelings, they still preferred to keep their moments of embracing and comforting each other to themselves, but yet again Armin was an exception to that.

He'd never really thought about why that was. He'd often feel like he was imposing on them, seeing things he shouldn't have. But in hindsight, he did suppose that it made sense for them to not care. Armin's presence probably wasn't even a thought sometimes. Armin was just as important to the closest thing he had for a family as they were to him. The realization of such an obvious thing hit him hard, as he, yet again, was shown that he was wrong about how little he viewed himself to be.

"Alright," he decided. "I'll think about it."

"Thank you." Armin didn't think he'd ever heard Eren's voice in that sort of tone before, with the desperation so intertwined with contrasting relief, a heartfelt ringing hanging in the air.

It was like Eren's voice was meant for speaking with passion.

They split up once they reached the stables and headed their separate ways; Eren wanted to take a nap while it was still early in the day, and Armin's stomach had been growling nonstop since the halfway-point on the trip.

Mikasa was asleep when Eren first walked into the bedroom, still not used to her slender figure beneath thin sheets that they now shared. Her feet jutted out from the bottom of the sheet, her fetal figure pulling the fabric out from its tucked state on the mattress. Eren smiled to himself at the sight of her hair frizzing out over the pillow, the slow, steady rise and fall of her ribs putting her at ease from the constant ache in her lower abdomen.

As Eren shed himself of his jacket, he sat down on the side of the bed to pull off the boots that he was too lazy to take off at the door; the midwife had shaken her head as he entered through the front door and left the room without a word. He glanced at the cradle in the corner of the room after both shoes had fallen with quiet thumps to the hardwood underneath his sweaty socks. The children were out in the living area of the home, as evident by the empty cradle.

He hadn't meant to wake her as he began to fumble with the straps of his harness, nearly deciding to just sleep in them as his patience quickly fizzled out when the first buckle was nothing short of stubborn. He hadn't even felt her weight shift on the bed as she sat up-the little sneak-her fingers making him jump as they wrapped around him from behind to swiftly undo the chest buckle; he caught her wrists in surprise before she could, however, taking her by surprise in return.

"You scared me," he said, turning his body to face her better, releasing her wrists. She didn't laugh, but her lips pulled up into an expression of amusement as she remembered his body's shocked reaction to her unexpected presence.

"Sorry," she said quietly, shrugging and then yawning as her sleep caught up to her. "What time is it?"

"Still early afternoon," he replied, holding back a yawn of his own. "We disbanded the meeting early."

"What happened?"

"I punched heichou in the face. I'm pretty sure I broke his nose."

"Eren! What happened?!" He didn't really want to think about the day's events, much less talk about them. But Mikasa did have a right to know.

"I'll tell you later," he promised, grabbing her hand and giving it a squeeze momentarily before climbing over her legs and crawling up to the head of the bed, dropping down with such a force that couldn't hide his exhaustion in the slightest. Mikasa had been about to press the matter, but seeing the bags under his eyes made her bite her tongue. It was a rare opportunity for him to get sleep without infantile interferences or stupid tribunals to worry about, and she didn't want to take that from him.

His eyes closed faster than he'd intended for them to; his mind was already prepared to waver into temporary darkness, but he fought it off for the time being.

Eren considered telling her about his conversation with Armin about naming the babies, as that was the most prominent thought still racing (albeit blurrily) through his mind. But the gentle sounds of his soft snoring were already escaping his mouth before he could make up his mind.

* * *

**shitty ending iS SHITTY SORry**

**Let it be known that from here on out, I will capitalizing the word 'Titan' ('titan') as is the correct format according to the manga/anime. Also, ****I hope you like the hints of Ereri and Eremin in here. They were completely unintentional but they suited my fancy so that's why they got written. I ship everything its not even fair cant i have just one ship**

**Name suggestions are still open. Any kind of suggestions are open, because this slow train is smelting the tracks as we go.**

**Thank you for reading and once again, sorry for the slow update! I'll try to update every week, but it will be as often as I can and won't have any defined schedule. Thanks for the feedback and encouragement. It really means a lot to me. (heart)**

**.elric-logic**

**P.S.**

**Let it also be known that I hate funimation, fuck the dub, fuck this shit**

**fuck it fuck it fuck fuck fuck fuck nope no absolutely not**

**10 lbs of nope in a 5-lb bag**

**I hate the casting and the translation and the everything and the wORDS THEYRE TAKING AWAY FROm THE mESSAGE DAmNIT I CANNOT ACCEPT THIS**

**the only thing i don't hate is Connie's voice and the fact that they're remastering the animation a little bit**

**just fuck it ****im not watching that piece of shit trash **

**except im going to watch it anyway bc how can i not god if ucking hate this show fuck everything**

**sorry dont mind me carry on with your day**


	3. Courage

**Greetings! Long time, no see, my pretties! (heart)**

**Sorry for the long wait for an update. Life is life, no? Writer's block is a bitch, too.**

**Intros out of the way-onto the story! Enjoy~**

* * *

It was a short while into the late afternoon, almost evening, in fact, when Mikasa decided to put down her book and shake Eren's lifeless figure awake. His jade eyes shot open and he sat up onto his elbows frantically, unable to escape the deep pit of worry constantly brewing in his stomach even in his slumber. He flashed his eyes through the room in one quick sweep before Mikasa's hand on his shoulder gave him a reassuring squeeze, where his green orbs found comfort in her dark eyes and her thin-lipped, rose-colored smile.

Eren's hand rose to his face, where his fist rubbed his sleep-tainted eyes. He yawned before pushing himself up into a sitting position, scratching the back of his head while Mikasa watched him in his charming ways.

"You probably already ate," was the first thing he said, blinking himself out of his sleepy stupor. Of course, food was on his mind. It was always on his mind; but only Mikasa knew that.

"Yes," Mikasa confirmed. "But I'm pretty sure Zoe saved the leftovers. I didn't eat much today." Her words twisted his face into a look of concern, and he faced her with a scolding look.

"Why not?" he asked, his tone layered with accusations.

"I haven't been able to keep much down," she admitted, Eren's eyes flashing dangerously, his whole body shifting as he looked at her head-on.

"What's wrong?"

"I've just been worried, is all." Her flat voice hardly convinced him.

"Worried enough to make you sick to your stomach?" Though he was convinced Mikasa was trying to bluff, her response told him otherwise; the disturbing truth behind the vague, intimidating future in front of them causing her physical deterioration not only sickened Eren but frightened him as well. His gaze fell from hers as silence settled in, Mikasa regretting telling him as soon as she met his eyes. She knew she'd magnified his already-strenuous angst and it was hardly fair.

"We'll split whatever is leftover," he forced out as he pushed himself off the foot of the bed. He was out the door in a heartbeat. Eren didn't give her a chance to say anything, and Mikasa had nothing to say regardless. Picking up the book she abandoned, she passed the next few minutes in eloquent words and descriptors, the conversation between Eren and the midwife in the other room mute to her ears.

Eren returned a short while later; Mikasa couldn't say for how long. In his sturdy arms were their children, each bound in a blanket of identifying color; pink for the girl, blue for the boy. These were new to Eren. The midwife had knit them herself, and gifted them earlier that day to Mikasa. He laid both of the infants down in the center of the bed, the boy first and then the girl, leaving them in Mikasa's company as he left wordlessly a second time.

She heard the noisy splashing of water running from the tap in the bathtub before she felt the unmistakable warm steam fog its way across the hall into the bedroom. When Eren returned to her beside again, in his hands were two bowls of reheated stew and small loaf of bread cut in half, one for each of them. Eren sat down on the side of the bed beside Mikasa's legs, holding out her food for her. She took it with both hands, mindful of the hot porcelain as she set it in her lap.

They ate in silence, rather, as silent as it could be with two babies drooling and learning to make sounds, along with the faucet running in the bathtub. Even more so, only Eren ate, while Mikasa stared down at the food in her bowl, fingering the spoon but not lifting it from the hot liquid. Her appetite was slow in returning to normal.

"At least eat the bread," he said with a defeated sigh after watching her for several moments. He took her bowl unexpectedly and piled it onto his empty one. Mikasa's eyes quickly blinked back an approaching set of guilty tears when she heard his sad tone; her hand reached out to the bread, taking it into her dry mouth with difficulty. She ate slowly, nibbles at a time, with sips of water in between. Eren slurped the soup down noisily, the spoon set beside him, forgotten.

By the time he finished, the tub was full. He came back to retrieve the dishes and began to clean them, but abandoned the task once crying reaching his ears.

"They're hungry," Mikasa said with uncanny certainty.

"How do you know?"

"Because the last time they ate was this morning," she explained, Eren reclaiming his seat beside her and reaching for the twins.

Mikasa busied herself with gathering her gown out from underneath her, pulling it up and exposing her stomach, while Eren handled the children in his arms, rocking them gently to calm their cries, handing them to her one at a time as she reached for them. He immediately supported her elbows with pillows, and pulled the gown up a little when it started to fall down over their heads.

Eren forced back the smile that widened like a ghost over his tight lips, watch the infants suckle tenderly on their mother. There was something about their innocence as they fed that always nailed him in the chest, and made his heart thump excitedly, but he couldn't describe it for the life of him.

* * *

Bellies full, diapers changed, and blankets wrapped snug and tightly around them, Eren laid the babies down in their cradle, rocking it until both sets of lids were shut and twitching with the glimmers of sleep. Then he turned his attention to Mikasa, who, as reminded by the midwife, needed a bath.

"Isn't Zoe going to do that?" she asked after Eren pulled the blanket back and announced his intentions. He shook his head and slid his arms carefully under her frame, Mikasa hooking one over his shoulders.

"I told her she could go home early," he explained, lifting her body from the bed.

"Why?"

"I wanted to spend some time alone with you while I had the chance," he admitted, her face flushing to match his.

"But I thought she was going to give me a bath."

"Aren't you capable of giving yourself one?" Her face reddened even more, as he stepped into the bathroom, turning to keep her head from colliding into the frame.

"Not when it comes to cleaning..._down there..._I have to, to keep it from getting infected_."_

"Infected?"

"A lot of skin tore during the birth, remember?"

"Oh, yeah."

"And I can't see...that area...very well, so Zoe's been the one to clean it."

"Oh." The implication of Eren's new job settled awkwardly between them as he helped her into the bath. He spent the whole time preparing himself for the task that was sure to set both faces on fire, if her undressing and nakedness didn't already.

But it had to be done, and he had to do it.

He was gentle at first with a washrag in his hand, gingerly working at the healing flesh beneath the water. Mikasa looked to the side and avoided his gaze whenever he glanced at her nervously, which was too frequent for her comfort. She couldn't deny that the pressure on her wounds stung, but it was tolerable, and she knew Eren couldn't have been gentler if he tried.

The tension in the air was getting to be too much for her. So she decided that now was a great time to ask the questions that were on her mind since before Eren came home.

"You never did tell me how the meeting went today," she said in a low, careful voice. She felt his hand pause, and already knew the answer because of his immediate reaction. "Nevermind, you don't need to. But why did you break heichou's nose?"

"He said something he shouldn't have." Mikasa opened her mouth to question further, but a blizzard of sentiments gusting through his eyes, matched with a painstakingly undeniable look of agony melding into his skin, cut her short of breath. If Eren wanted to leave it at that, then she was going to stay in the dark by choice.

Guilt was eating him alive as he touched her tender tears. He could feel her body tensing and he knew this wasn't a pain he could shoulder for her, one she couldn't share. While they were both under the disappointed glares of their elders in command, and both to blame for their irresponsible consequences, Mikasa was the one to bear the physical pain of carrying the children and being forced to sit out on her duties as a soldier.

It had been gut-wrenching to watch the birth, and to sit there and do nothing while Mikasa was in labor. Eren had felt helpless, knowing he was the reason she was in the indescribable pain that she was, and he struggled to internalize the fact that he couldn't do anything to help her other than hold her hand and stay by her side.

It was infinitely worse when the wounds stretched open on her sensitive skin. She had lost a lot of blood, which did nothing to help her recovery, and was a large contributing factor as to why she was still in such a weakened state. And because the skin ripped in the middle of the birth, while the baby was crowning, the doctor couldn't do more than apply pressure with a measly cloth. The wounds weren't stitched closed until after she passed through labor, and even then the babies were the priority.

He could only imagine the weight on her shoulders that he couldn't lift, and he hated it. He knew it was his fault, and he hated it. He had been so stupid and careless, and because of it, he had screwed up their lives and the Scouting Legion's intricate and fragile plans to take back Wall maria. He gave the military Police some grounds of controlling him, which was the least helpful thing he could have done. He set everyone back, and hindered humanity's step forward against the Titans. It was all his fault, and he hated it.

And the guilt was eating him alive.

"Eren, are you crying?" Her voice was his saving grace; he snapped out of his foggy trance and cleared his mind, pushing all thoughts away into the dark before they could entrap him again. He didn't answer; instead, he busied himself with carefully rubbing at the tears. When his thoughts tried to pull him back into the trance, however, he dropped the rag into the water with a splash and stood abruptly, turning away from her. He was done tending to her wounds, anyway.

"Don't leave," she said, a little too late. He was already out the door when her voice reached him, forcing a pause in his steps. He sighed angrily; immature of him, he knew, but it was easier to be angry than grief-stricken, and he knew it would be easier on Mikasa to see him in any state that wasn't one of pain.

Eren backtracked, the lantern above his head flickering with the air currents his movements caused. His frame was enveloped by the steam of the bath as he entered the room, leaning back frustratedly against the counter, fingers curling tightly around the edges.

"What?" he asked, his fingertips still wet with the tears he'd wiped away hastily as he'd left, hoping they would go unseen by her expert eyes.

"Please don't walk away like that," she said, her sad eyes meeting his boldly. "Do it to anyone else, but not to me." His gaze darted down to the floor apologetically, the obvious hurt in her eyes reigniting the guilt that now resided in every fiber of his being, his emotions flaring as he fought it off with anger. "I'm ready to get out," she decided, quickly filling in the ensuing silence.

"You haven't even washed your hair," he pointed out, making no move to help her from the tub or to retrieve a towel.

"You're one to talk," she retorted, the pregnancy's hormones not quite depleted from her system. "Your hair is greasier than butter. When's the last time you had a bath?"

Their eyes glared at one another for an anxiously long moment before Eren _finally_ unbuckled his maneuvering belts. They fell to floor in a gentle clatter a moment later, after he'd loosened their holds and stepped out of them. His shirt was off and cast to the floor a second later, but when his fingers began to fumble with the hem of his white jeans, they froze.

There was Mikasa, who was already bare-skinned before him, which he hadn't gotten completely used to yet. And here he was, about to strip down to his own nakedness, and join her in the bath. He could already feel his face reddening; she had, indirectly, invited him in with her, something they had never done before. She hadn't seen him fully naked since a fateful night nine months ago, yet here he was, about to do it again with little hesitation.

He wouldn't admit it to her, but Eren was nervous. This wasn't a heat-of-the-moment thing. They weren't about to _do the deed_. They were just going to take a bath, two partners, a family, taking a bath. And he was _nervous_.

As his fingers struggled with the pants' button, he was saved for the second time that day with a soft cry carrying across the hall from their bedroom. Relief hit him like a tidal wave as he left the room, rolling his eyes to feign irritation. Mikasa saw right through it, but she kept quiet, smiling to herself thoughtfully when he was out of sight, tending to the fussy child.

The baby-the restless one-had only needed a short rocking before he was back to sleep, beside his sister in the cradle. And Eren was forced to return to the bathroom, right back where he started. He found Mikasa with a bar of soap in her hands, twisting with her fingers absentmindedly. With a spur of courage his pants were undone and pushed to the floor in seconds, his feet stepping into the bath tentatively with his back to her. He didn't dare turn to face her until his bottom half was submerged—as if it would hide anything.

He blamed the red skin of his face on the water's steam, even though it wasn't that hot.

They sat in silence for the longest time. Mikasa had eventually taken to dousing her short locks with a handful of shampoo, Eren following suit and leaning forward to splash water onto his mop, taking the bottle from her. He didn't get very far when there came the distant sound of knocking on the front door, catching both of their attentions like rabbits. Both of them froze in the same instant, dread filling their cores and their eyes meeting and widening simultaneously.

A long moment passed, the home eerily quiet as they listened for further noise. They could hear the soft breathing in other room, the furnace in the far corner of the main area of the home, the faucet dripping every so often right beside them. Another few agonizingly long seconds passed before the knocking sounded again, more frantically this time, with a familiar voice calling out each of their names, muffled by the walls and distance between them.

"Armin," Eren sighed in relief, standing abruptly as water fell noisily from his frame, splashing Mikasa. The shampoo bottle fell into the water, forgotten, as Eren stepped out onto the bathmat and grabbed the towel on the counter, hastily drying his legs. Mikasa leaned forward to rinse her hair quickly while Eren shrugged into his boxers and then his pants, struggling with one wet foot pushing into the leg hole as he hopped out of the room on one leg, hurrying for the door. He had barely pulled the hem of his pants up to hang low on his hips, his bare, wet torso glistening in the dim light of the room, his hand on the door handle, yanking it open as Armin's fist in the air was ready to knock again.

"Eren!" Armin cried, pushing past his friend to enter the home, looking around the room frantically for nothing in particular. Eren around outside quickly before shutting the door and locking it behind him, turning to Armin who had began to pace.

"Armin, what's wrong?" His friend was never this jumpy or anxious.

"I've got bad news, Eren. Where's Mikasa?"

"She's in the bath," he replied, studying Armin's worried look, his stomach churning. "Why?"

"I'm right here," Mikasa said, leaning against the wall like earlier, her drenched hair dripping onto Eren's shirt which hung loosely around her frame, hardly covering the tops of her bare thighs. She looked out of breath, wiping her wet bangs out of her face as she heaved laboriously for breaths. "What's wrong?"

"I told you to stop getting up and walking around on your own," Eren scolded, his anger from earlier slowly rising back into his system. He crossed the room towards her and scooped her up again, much like earlier that day.

"We don't have time for you two to bicker right now," Armin said, his unnaturally strained tone eating at both of their nerves as Eren carried her over to a chair at the table, setting her down in it. "This is really, _really_ bad."

"Armin, what the hell is wrong?" Eren asked, his stomach fluttering with anxiety as he turned to face his friend. He'd never seen Armin like this before. His aqua eyes were wider than plates, he was trembling so hard he looked like he was about to fall over, his skin was paler than Mikasa's and glistening with sweat, and he was still dressed in his full uniform. "Are you sick? You should probably sit down."

"We don't have time for that! Erwin-danchou and Levi-heichou are going to be here any second, and who knows how long we'll have before the military Police show up-"

"Why, Armin? What the hell is going on!?"

"They're going to move you guys into the jail cell beneath the military court tonight. They've rescheduled the trial to tomorrow morning."

* * *

**holy fucking plot twist cliff hanger thing**

**so yeah, once again, sorry for the extremely long delay. I won't bother with excuses, but expect this for future updates. I don't have much time to myself these days. Also, I'm sorry if it's a little bit on the short side. Like Levi**

**Unlike my other fics, this one is actually edited!1ONE That's partially why it took a little longer to be ready for uploading. I restarted a couple times, too, because I didn't like what I initially wrote. Needless to say, I'm happy with how it came out, and I hope you are, too. Still don't know how long it will be or where it will, though I have an idea.**

**And, as always, there are plenty of ideas up my sleeve for future fics, so expect more in the future. That goes for smut, as well. Hope you enjoy what is to come!**

**(heart)**

**.elric-logic**

**p.s. Dont watch the dub im not kidding its horrible**

**p.s.s. The book Mikasa is reading is a book of poems. Because books still exist in the SNK world, and nobody is illiterate, which for some reason people seem to think otherwise. It's only books about the outside world and ones dating back to before the Titans appeared that are taboo. People need to get their facts straight.**

**** _For those who want a little bit more information on Mikasa's wound, it is a tear between the vag and bootyhole and can include the labia and inside the bootyhole as well, depending on the serverity/degree of the tear. It is a semi-common thing to happen to first-time mothers, or if the baby/babies is/are big, if the mother has poor nutrition or weak skin, or if the baby is being birthed in the wrong position (such as a breech birth or face-up instead of face-down). _**

_**(In Mikasa's case, she is a first-time mother with poor nutrition. I like to think she had generally strong skin, but over the time of her pregnancy with her poor diet it weakens. Also, if you're curious, the babies are slightly smaller than average, given the fact that there are two of them and she, once again, had a poor diet while carrying them, and they were both born in correct (face-down) positions. The severity Mikasa has is known as a second-degree tear, where the muscle and skin around the vag and/or perineum (space between vag and butthole) are torn.)**_

**_This tear can also be called an episiotomy if the doctor/midwife purposefully makes the cut to help birth the child, which is a common thing for breech births or if they're birthing the baby with tongs, or if you want a speedy birth (though they always use an anesthetic injection to the area first, and it's always pre-discussed with the mother/parents). This is not the case for Mikasa, as the skin tore unexpectedly during her birth, and it was stitched up afterward. *_***


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